March 2011
I’m laying here. Just laying here, more alone than I’ve been in awhile. I can’t help but think about how I’ll die alone, and if any of this will be worth anything? If all the stress, work, effort and thinking will have been worth it. I have no faith, so no shoulder to rest my head upon. I’m just laying here, alone. Is there any point in any of it? Will it matter what I look like, what college I...
“It’s the wanting to know that makes us matter.”
– Tom Stoppard, Arcadia (via underpaidgenius)
I wish I was beautiful.
I haven’t cried in such a long time. It’s like, I’ve internalized so much that it just seems to just melt away. Subconsciously I know internalizing these things is straining me and tiring me, but I don’t have time to bring them to the surface and deal with them. I don’t have time to truly express emotion or myself anymore. Not even time to sit and cry over the things that are upsetting in this...
